Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
organizing the empties. That sober.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
