Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
