he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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