i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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