im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
