I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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