She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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