i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
