Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
