I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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