I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize