we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
