I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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