ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
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Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
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You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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