All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
