yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize
