Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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