Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
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When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
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I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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