would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
