I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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