I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
