just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize