Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
