If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
