Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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