Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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