so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through