Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
