Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
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