Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Randomize
