Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
