dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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