I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
