just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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