No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
