you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
