i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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