Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
