You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
