LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
