my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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