Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize