If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
