Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
