my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize