Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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