You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
