i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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