Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
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We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
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I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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