Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
