office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
