I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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